For those who weren't interested in the details of the adoption process, you can sigh with relief that this is the last one on the topic until Parrish Little #2 enters the scene (which let's face it, I want to write to you about tomorrow or next week, but of course, it's all in God's timing now).
When a couple returns home with an adopted baby, much is similar to that of natural born babies, but there are differences. People arrive at the home to hold the new little one, people will make comments about what the child looks like and which parent he or she resembles the most, life will mold into the new normal that is family life with a child.
Some differences are minor. The people flooding the home of a newborn don't often bring meals to the new parents (presumably because she didn't go through a birth, and they have been parents for a while now, so the assumption is they don't need it). The comments about the child's looks are often said with surprise (he kind of looks like you!) or are a far reach from reality (he kind of looks like you! Even though his hair, eye, skin color and bone structure are all different than yours!).
Some differences are wonderful. The people who have been praying diligently for a family are over the moon ecstatic to see their prayers come true.
Some differences are huge. Mostly, more paperwork. Yup, adoptive parents, that's right. It's not over yet. For the most part, your paperwork nightmares are over. You do have to have two follow up appointments with your home study provider, so she can evaluate how you are parenting your child and give her stamp of approval before the adoption can be finalized.
The insurance companies require social security numbers for new children, so there is paperwork required there.
In six months (or longer, like ours) a child's finalization paperwork and official birth certificate will be released. Then a son or daughter is officially, in the eyes of government, a member of their new family, even though they have been a member of that family since they were born.
FUTURE ADOPTIVE PARENTS READ THIS!!!
When you apply for a social security number for your child, make 100% sure you get a new number. It is often part of the paperwork the birth mother fills out at the hospital without even realizing it. If you do not get a new number, there is a chance she will receive an exact matching social security card to the one your child will receive. It is dangerous to have multiple cards available, so please make sure!
After the social security number is taken care of you, as far as legal stuff goes, an adoptive family can be a family with no more breath holding or things to check off.
Depending on the level of openness a family has with the birth family of a child, pictures, letters, text messages, photo sharing sites and visits are in the future, but these are all blessings and a wonderful way to do right by your child and the woman or couple who gave the gift of family to someone else.
Depending on the racial background of the birth and adoptive families, answering questions from strangers and other things you might not think of will become part of your daily life.
Other than that, an adoptive family functions as a family. There is a lot of diapers, a lot of learning and most of all, a lot of love.
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