The Stockpile

When Jim and I started the adoption process, we did the best we could to return to what I like to call the "college budget".  When we were first married and Jim was a full time student, I worked two part time jobs, sometimes three.  I wasn't making a lot, so we lived with very little income.  We stuck to a strict budget.  We lived mostly off of ramen noodles, mac and cheese and boxed meals, but we lived comfortably in our tiny apartment and didn't complain that we couldn't afford to eat out.
The budget got a little squishier when Jim graduated and we started living on a regular income.  Of course, expenses also increased.  A mortgage that didn't include utilities like our rent payment made living a little more expensive, as did my interest in health and our acquiring three dogs.
However, we have done a lot of cutting since we saw the price tag on adoption.  From renegotiating my cell phone bill, going to a new internet provider, to returning to a more strict grocery and date night budget (though I admit, they are both higher than they used to be! Especially groceries... mac and cheese and ramen noodles are really cheap but not exactly the healthiest option).

One thing that was added to the budget, though, was the stockpile item.

Every month, we buy a baby item.

After scouring the internet and reading plenty of "what you need for baby" lists, I made a list of my own.  I know that once there are children in our home I will realize my list was off in one way or another, but I think I have the basics covered. 

I walk through the clearance aisle of Wal*Mart if I'm there, or use a coupon at the local drug store, or buy things when they are on sale, but every month I check something off of the baby stuff list.  Small, essential items like bottles, swaddling blankets, onesies, towels.  Just one or two a month to add to the pile so when we get "the call", we won't have to spend the first 24 hours of having a baby in the baby aisle trying to buy all the stuff we need.

Some sweet people in my life have added some things to our little stockpile.  My best friend sent us gender neutral onesies early on in the process. My mom bought cloth diapers when she saw some on sale.  My sister-in-law dropped off a few items her son is no longer using.

Admittedly, I didn't think we would have the time to collect so many items.  Maybe it's just me, but as a potential adoptive parent couple, I thought Jim and I were going to be picked "quickly".  I mean, our profile represents the best of us-- we are a kind of cute, athletic, musical, smart (well, Jim is smart), animal loving couple in a small, supportive community.  I thought certainly someone would snatch us right up. 

Obviously, the woman who is meant to find us completely adorable hasn't seen our profile yet.  We know that it's all in God's timing so we try to keep looking forward.  I look at this pile with a mix of impatience, hope for the future, sadness for the current circumstances... and a bit of satisfaction in being somewhat prepared (I am a planner, and knowing that I have everything my baby will need the first couple weeks except formula and a car seat has me feeling a little more at ease.  Because, you know, having burp clothes means I will totally know what to do with a newborn, right?).

In any case, our guest bedroom currently looks like that of expectant parents.  A lot of cute little pastel colored things I hope to get to use one day.  A lot of hope.